Heimweh

Heimweh

It’s a word you know right down to the bone,

Monosyllabic with so much undertone.

And it makes the wine taste sweeter, food richer.

And it paints with each exhale the perfect picture.

 

Sometimes you let the word rest on your chest;

Find the slot in your ribs where it fits the best.

Sometimes you hide it in fear it will be found

By other eyes, by your eyes, by those not around.

 

It is a word that you dream of in lucid color

And walk among its letters like with a lover,

But the embrace of it is warmer—that of a mother;

You wake from it, bereft, looking for another.

 

And when another speaks the word same as you,

When the arch of syllable sounds bold and true:

The word becomes more. The person the same.

And that word will slowly become their name.

 

It’s a word that you know right down to the bone

And that word is simple;

It is home.

Greetings from Deutschland!

I know this blog scarcely updates but maybe you noticed a longer pause than usual and I am here to give you a much deserved answer: I am in Germany.

The move was interesting and, I have to say, I would not have been able to do it without all the people who helped me. My parents made sure I kept my head screwed on straight in the lead up and the strangers I met in Germany, like my taxi driver who spoke to my house master for me, made sure I didn’t lose my head entirely. I do want to point out, since I am sure a few might be a little skeptical as to why I am studying in Germany if I couldn’t even talk to my house master in German. Well, I could talk to him in German, but he spoke a special dialect that I didn’t know and he didn’t feel like speaking High German–as a result we weren’t really speaking the same language. It sucked, but my taxi driver saw me having trouble and stuck around. Who ever said Germans are cold are liars.They are very nice, provided you are on time.

But who cares about the struggles, right?! Let’s see the adventures!

1. Tübingen

This little town is next door to the one I am studying at and is beautiful. They have two competing churches that attempt to ring their bells louder than the other on every quarter hour. Which is really funny because one goes and then the other starts to ring even louder. However, if you are in the bell tower when they happen to go off, like we had been, it can be a little less fun…

There is also a great brauerei: Gasrhausbrauerei. If you want something light and sweet, the Apfelweiß is delicious beyond compare. If you want something that actually tastes like beer, get the classic weiß beer.

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2. Achalm

After you hike past a neighborhood and then a bunch of sheep and a rather steep incline, you get some spectacular views. There is an old fire watch tower up top that you can get on top of and see for miles in the Schwabian Alps.

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3. Hohenzollern Castle

This Castle was the original homestead of the Prussian empire. The chapels were beautiful, but sadly we could not take any pictures inside. The outside is rather gorgeous too. I also caught a glimpse of the prince, which pretty much made my week.

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Personal

Hey all!

I know I’ve been rather absent…for months…

I have had a story auto-posting, which was fun to set up. Apparently I messed the links up to the parts in the series, but now that is all fixed! You should check it out if you haven’t already–all parts now accessible from any one post in the series:

http://wp.me/p2x1Mz-h2

Next up should be a Science Fiction short story broken into 3 Parts 😀

Here’s a tease:

LunarLanding2

 

Yes it’s on the moon. And YES IT IS AWESOME.

Just sayin’

Breaking

Author notes at end

Breaking

You know,

I never thought I’d go crazy.

I never thought I’d watch my mind

Lose and push the daisies.

 

I never thought I’d see the same world

So entirely wrong.

 

It wasn’t really gradual

I woke up one day on the wrong axis

And I walked like a seaman

With a quickly acquired practice,

While the thread of reality crested

And broke under my sure step.

 

I never dreamt any brighter

In the hysteria or in the clear.

My dreams are just colored glass;

Through which I cautiously peer.

I always thought my dreams would speak

But they were always mute.

 

Now I’m lost in this madness

And I reach for those of my ilk

I clutch at fingers of ghosts

And blood already spilled,

Because this madness will ruin me

All too quickly.

A/N: I’m not going crazy. Well, I am because work is really WORK (all formatting intentional), but not this kind of crazy. I just had this paranoia recently come over me and it freaked me out,. Mostly because, in retrospect, I just slipped into it despite my rational tendencies. Like I had this crazy, wild idea that made no sense, but it made sense all the same. only to me. only in that manufactured reality.

Consequently, I wrote this up because I wanted to try to capture the feeling.

Syd the Sassy Atheist 2

This chapter was inspired by my mom. Thanks mom. I hope you find the joke I put in here just for you.

Part 1 | Part 3

Syd the Not-So-Sassy Atheist

To say Syd was unimpressed with life would be an understatement. She never had the lust for life that many share–those who create bucket lists and drag unwilling others on extended vacations into potentially hazardous situations. No, Syd had always been content to curl up in her corner of life and let it wash on over her like a gentle tide. The only movement she made was to scratch away the building barnacles.

However, to say Syd was unimpressed with Life, would be wholly incorrect. This personification of all that breathes and eats and sleeps is very impressive.

Or, Syd supposes, as impressive as a room full of squirrels can be.

After emerging from the tunnel and stepping through the light, Syd found herself transported to an amalgamation of a principal’s office and a waiting room. There are a good dozen chairs set up behind her with scattered magazines, such as Reaper Daily or Spectral Health. The walls are lined with dark wood bookcases packed with heavy, vellum bound volumes. Syd would attempt to read the titles, but the squirrels have a penchant for these books. They run and scurry along the shelves, knocking a few to the floor in frantic scrambles to the top.

Directly ahead of Syd is a large, cherry wood desk. There is a large calendar on it–or, at least, Syd assumes it’s a calendar. It is really just a grid with no numbers or months or holidays, only blank cells. Nevertheless, Life had managed to pen a few appointments in, which tips Syd off to its true purpose. One appointment, marked in red and with an angry face next to it, cements her belief.

“Annoying Atheist Arrives. Argh.” Syd reads the appointment aloud, her head tilted to accommodate the angle. She frowns. “I wouldn’t say I’m annoying.”

“You also wouldn’t say you’re dead, so you’re really batting a thousand today.”

Syd jumps half a mile and spins around to see who had spoken. In one of the chairs is a woman with golden hair and sharp features. Her eyes are translucent, but sufficiently piercing to make Syd wish she could hide under the desk or maybe become one of the squirrels and scurry into the air ducts.

Then, upon thinking about the squirrels, Syd suddenly realizes they’re not here. She scans the room for them, but the only other living thing is the woman.

“I take many forms,” Life divulges and brushes an acorn from the sleeve of her white, loose robe. “A room of squirrels is a new one for me, but I suppose that is your perception of life.” She locks eyes with Syd. “Why squirrels?”

Syd laughs uncomfortably. “Because life is nuts?”

There’s a long pause and then Life’s mouth quirks. “You’re right, annoying is not the proper adjective for you.” She stands fluidly and carefully picks her way to behind the desk. Despite the bookish environment, Life looks regal. Syd can almost swear she feels the cool of a drafty castle.

Life rests her chin in one dainty, pale hand. “Abrasive might suit you.”

“Or alluring,” Syd attempts to no avail. Life just waves the suggestion off.

“I don’t believe you came here to speak to me about your qualities, though. I assume you’re here for reincarnation. What god do I owe this wonderful appointment to?”

“I’m an atheist,” Syd explains, baffled that Life seems to not even know this. “Not believing in a god is kind of in the name.”

Life shakes her head. “I was afraid of that. Sometimes you guys have revelations on the way here and this is so much easier. Oh well, I suppose this is less paperwork for me in the end.”

Suddenly, Life ducks down and begins rummaging in her drawers. Syd tries to crane closer, but is kept in her seat for fear of upsetting Life. She’d hate to have to go back to Life’s Janitor and explain she lost her chance because she was too nosy.

But one question couldn’t hurt, right?

“So I still get reincarnated?” Syd hazards.

Life makes a sound of agreement. Sydney nods to herself. She can most definitely work with that. Maybe she can be a wolf or an elk  or a water buffalo always seemed cool. Or she could go into the ocean and be a shark–live off the coast of Australia and chomp some cute surfers in the ass.

Syd’s thoughts are derailed when Life produces a glass display that thumps loudly onto the desk. Beneath the thick pane are two bugs pinned to a canvas pinboard. “So,” Life asks and gestures to each specimen in turn. “A dog tick or a deer tick?”

Syd groans: dead or alive, Life still sucks.

Dear MonSanto

Dear MonSanto

 

I like to eat food

It keeps me alive

And sometimes it tastes good

When I eat what I like.

 

I’m not terribly choosy.

Whatever’s on sale or I know how to cook

But now that’s not good enough–

Now I have to take a closer look.

 

Because you decided I don’t need to live:

I just need to live long enough to buy.

And hey! With 9 billion people

Who cares if, like, a quarter survive?

 

You put known carcinogens in our food.

Force farmers to grow your seeds

And, if they don’t, you take their farms

Because it’s the whole industry you apparently need.

 

And when studies come out against you

Well, just sweep them on under the rug!

With an axe or a chainsaw for good measure

To get rid of that pesky, truth, bug.

 

So, in conclusion

And this is all you had to read

I hope some EU country subpoenas you to hell

so that you can never sell another fucking seed.

 

Love,

Erin

Homeward Bound

This is from an own-character universe, so it’s really me fanning over my own creation. Go me!

You might see a story from this -verse, but we shall see. The Awakening is connected, actually–this is the Interloper. A meddler. A traveler. 

(from m-w) Interloper: one that intrudes/interferes in a place or sphere of activity

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Homeward Bound

Footprints of black dirt upon the road

Lodestone keeps pulling me home.

 

There is darkness in the sky

And it hangs low on the mountaintops.

I watch as the mist rolls in

Over the softly swaying crops.

 

The road has been abandoned for centuries,

Given over to death’s penitentiaries.

Sometimes you can see the phantoms on the shoulder:

While each year, the winters grow colder.

 

There is star dust in the air tonight

And I can taste it in the back of my throat:

The sharp sting of explosive creation

Timeless, but it still makes me choke.

 

The Wolf will not let me rest

And the Coyote continues his chase:

Brothers out to prove they’re the best

While I have only time to waste.

 

Where the road ends,

I continue.